Overwhelmed

Sorry for the lack of posts lately! We've been incredibly busy with the conference season starting up and I had a class in the minimester, so life of course is crazy on this end. Hopefully, we'll be able to post a little more frequently.

On the eve of an interview for a position at a parish in Virginia, I'm less nervous than my last interview, a little more confident, and completely overwhelmed by God's love. I know that this seems to repeat the things that I've said previously, but the truth is, the closer I get to finishing my degree and working in a parish, the more overwhelmed I feel by God's love.

I've never been picked first for everything. I'm THAT girl. If life was a pageant, I'd be first runner up. Seriously, I'm always the girl that is in second place etc. Even when I applied to be an RA at my undergrad, I was chosen as an alternate. I ended up being called the summer before my sophomore year and asked to take the place of an RA. I did and tried my best to rise to the occasion. The thing is, I might be second place, or the second pick, but once I get it, I'll do everything in my power to show you that I want to do the job and that the decision to put me in that place was worth it. Being an RA was incredibly rewarding and one of the best jobs I've ever had. I like to think I rose to the occasion. So, imagine my surprise to have parishes persuing me. It's an unreal experience! A few parishes think that I'm at least worthy enough to interview me. One parish is even flying me out of state for an interview. I can't believe it. It's hard for me to understand how I could ever be worthy, how is it possible that I get to be in this ministry? I don't want to sound naive about being a youth minister. At the same time, I'm kind of just in that WHOA stage. To quote papa, "I'm just a simple laborer in the vineyard of the Lord". It's crazy to see my education and my experience coming together, that there's the potential for me to be working at one of these parishes. Even more amazing to me is the concept of God working through me, being and instrument that will bring people hopefully to him. It's overwhelming, it's exciting, it's humbling and it's so HUGE, while at the same time so small. Being small is something that I'm coming to realize every day. This job search has brought me to my knees, I can't imagine what it will be like in full time ministry. I'm young, I love me some Jesus and I'm full of hope for our Church. Keep me in your prayers. I am so unworthy and that just overwhelms me! I'm praying for you. Keep the faith and keep on loving those teens.